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| 10:39pm 25/03/2006 |
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mood:  lonely music: panic! at the disco
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people never want to just hang out anymore.
we always have to "party"
lame
i don't mind staying in at night, but it really would be so much more enjoyable if i had someone to do it with. AKA a boyfriend?
i really should've gone home this weekend.
at least that way i could've had a heart to heart with Summer. it's different not having someone in your life to talk to about things. that could be one of the reasons that i so feel the need to have a boyfriend; to have someone be a "witness to my life". but i suppose if that was all i wanted then i would have someone. but i rarely find people that strike my interest.
i hate that summer isn't 10 minutes away like before cuz there are so many nights that i just want to go to her house and lay around and be silly. and talk about things that you can't talk about on normal days. and talk about things that are hard to talk about. and talk about things that upset you- and if you cry it's okay cuz we'll cry together. and then we'll cheer each other up and laugh until we can't breathe. she's the only person i do that with. |
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| my 19th! |
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| 10:45pm 20/03/2006 |
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My birthday weekend was amazing! Everyone made me feel so special, my friends are wonderful :)
They bought me lots of fun little gifts and we went out to a club to dance! It was soooo fun!! Then we went back to Ryan's and hung out with a bunch of people. I love just hanging out with friends and having a good time! Everyone sang me Happy Birthday which was so cool cuz I don't think my friends have sang that to me since like my Sweet 16 haha.
Overall it was pretty much the best bday ever
I got a new cell phone && my nose pierced
And my parents took me out for seafood yummy :) |
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| 11:00pm 12/03/2006 |
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today was so beautiful!!! i probably would've been happier if i had someone to go outside and play with though :(
i've been a little depressed lately, and have had a million things on my mind...
I am nervous && I am self conscious
My birthday is friday and i don't know what i'm doing and i wish i had someone special to spend it with... or any day for that matter. |
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| 11:22pm 20/02/2006 |
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do you ever just get in one of those blah moods, where everything irritates you for no reason?
that was me today
This weekend was fun, I got to see my BESTEST friend! And I will see her next week too <3
ohh and i like a boy
and i hate it |
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| Just a day, just an ordinary day... |
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| 01:44am 16/02/2006 |
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It's pouring rain right now and I'm happy because 1) I like the sound of the rain and 2) I'm glad it's not snowing.
Today was productive. I studied for 4 hours straight and then sat and read about 60 pages of my favorite book. I couldn't put it down... To anyone who has not read The Perks of Being a Wallflower, I suggest it. |
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| 02:29am 13/02/2006 |
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Everyone's planning what they're going to do on valentine's day. And I'm not going to lie, I am completely jealous.
When I became single this year, I was so happy. And just in time for my first year of college, how convenient.
But here's what I've realized: the only reason that I have been enjoying it so much is because I don't have somebody always worrying about what I'm doing and who I'm with. I like being able to hang out with who I want when I want. I want to go where I want to go. I want to have guyfriends without someone being jealous about it...
But I want a boyfriend too. Can't I have all these things?
I don't "hook up" with people, I don't have booty calls, hell I don't even makeout with people. Let's be honest, I've probably only kissed about 10 guys in my lifetime. I'm picky. If I'm interested in a guy that probably means I like him a lot, that's just the way it goes.
Bottom line: I love the freedom but I want the romance.
I want someone to kiss and hug. Someone you can talk to about anything and everything. Someone you can laugh with, do stupid things in front of, and not feel embarrassed about it. Someone who will kiss you in the rain, and cuddle with you at night.
okay i'm done. i'm such a sap. |
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| 02:29am 09/02/2006 |
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This week has been stressful as hell and I cannot wait until tomorrow night. To just hang out with some cool new friends and relax! Hopefully I'll get to see Summerly Flowers soon because I miss her like crazy. I've been reading a lot lately... a hobby that's probably more productive than surfing myspace all day. I am no longer a myspace whore haha sarah :) Nothing really special has been happening... just a bunch of things that have been pissing me off I guess. This weekend better be good, anyone wanna chill?! Come visit me!! Umm... I've been having dreams about everyone that I miss.. Last night I had a dream that me and Anthony were dancing in the middle of some building. WEIRD, but just cuz I miss him! I will be in Holly the 17th-19th so get a hold of me to chill. I'll probably be working though so I can't get too wild lol. Soo I'm thinking about trying out for Eastern's dance team. Umm... I'm not going to say anything other than bottom line: I'd be doing what I love to do. Mom took me to lunch today, we had some nice conversation. I love Mommy daughter time because I really feel that things have been getting better. Better meaning not screaming down each other's throats every other day.
Sidenote: exclude the comment about the guy at the bottom of my last entry. He ended up being completely rude and ignorant. Anyone who really knows me would've laughed at the things he said about me. But hey who needs BOYS, right?
much love. |
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| 12:54am 26/01/2006 |
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I haven't updated in almost a month...
The year 2006 has taken an incredible U-turn. I have spent the past few weeks with my favorite girly in the world, and we have had some good, bad!, and CRAZY times! Ohh how I love Summerly Flowers!
Beside the fact that I constantly stress myself out, I've learned to ignore the worst of things. I am enjoying life, and for good reason. I have amazing friends here at Eastern and amazing ones to go back to at home. And even though my family drives me absolutely insane, I love them to death.
I am 3 weeks into class and I have already ruined my streak of actually going to class everyday. Tomorrow morning I am not going to my english class. My academics are one thing that I need to put a bigger focus on because they are definitely my biggest agent of stress right now, but there is so much around me to take my mind off it that I sometimes forget what my priorities are.
Tonight I had an amazing time with an amazing guy. <3
( Here are some pics of 2006 so far ) |
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| I hope he is a gentleman... |
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| 05:51pm 29/12/2005 |
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So break has been fun so far. It was great seeing everyone at the game last week! I have missed all my friends sooo much. And of course now that I'm home I get to make some money $$. But it just doesn't feel the same without Florida!! I want to be laying in the sun right now!
Christmas was good. Giftcards and money mostly (SHOPPING ANYONE?) and a new digital camera. It was great seeing Chris, first time since the summer. I think he's moving back soon though... i hope maybe? He's like an older brother to me, not just a cousin... or at least he used to be when he was actually around :(
Tuesday night was... FUN! I love 3D first of all, my girlies always make me happy. It was weird not knowing many people at Eric's but it was nice getting to know people!
My mom put my grades on the fridge, hehe. I feel like a little kid :)
As much as I love my family... I'm ready to go back to Eastern. And I know my roomie feels the same!! |
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| here i am once again |
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| 02:08am 18/12/2005 |
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Home for the Holidays!! woo-hoo. Well nothing really to celebrate for yet, I'm not really in the best mood anyways. I AM SO FRUSTRATED! Okay, so I didn't exactly get ditched but he did basically kick me out of his apartment. It was just a silly/stupid situation, which I'm sure I'll be over tomorrow morning. I can't stay mad at friends, I love them too much.
I had some good times this past week.. and some, eh, not so good times. I'm really starting to like eastern ALOT. I'm making lots of new friends, and becoming super close with some (SARAH and LYSA<3). Everything is great.
But now I'm back home and I feel like everyone here has there own lives to deal with. There's so many people I miss that I want to hang out with and catch up with. Maybe there's one person inparticular that I'm worried about but I don't really feel like getting into that...
Christmas is coming, and that means CHRIS IS COMING HOME. I miss him :(
I took a bubble bath tonight. One luxury that isn't found at college, I thought it would make me feel better but it didn't do much more than refresh myself. I think that tomorrow night's xmas party will be a good way to wind down and try to relieve some stress.
I miss Summer Baldwin.... :( ALOT |
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| blah blah blah |
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| 08:19pm 11/12/2005 |
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i hope this week is better than the last.
i'll be home this weekend so if anyone wants to do something let me know! |
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| MaKe DaNcE.... NoT WaR. |
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| 07:44pm 07/12/2005 |
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Yesterday. Me and Lysa took a lovely trip back to Holly. We visited Summy at work, then i brought Lys to meet the fam, then went to Holly's bball game. We lost terribly, but i was happy to get to see everyone. I miss all my friends sooo much!!!
I can't wait to go home for break. Time to relax and hang out with friends. and work! haha
It's complicated? yeah... i guess it is. i hate it. i hate boys. |
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| 06:00pm 05/12/2005 |
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new layout that i love!!
Going to Holly's game tomorrow night and I'm very excited to see everyone. |
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| It always comes back to punch you in the face... |
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| 05:00pm 04/12/2005 |
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I have too many regrets. And they're probably not what you think. I feel like I'm finally getting my life back together... or at least putting a good effort into trying.
I was looking at pictures from the dance banquet and just kept thinking... why don't I have any pictures with this person?? or this person?? I feel like I lost a lot of friends last year, and it kills me. I hate it, and it's my own fault. And i miss everyone like crazy. I miss the times from my sophmore and junior years that i have pictures of!
KASSI GARNER: we will hang out again soon! i miss you and all of our fun times!! We've come too far! I love you!
SARA WINKLER: where do i even start? I feel like we went from being super close to barely even talking. And i miss you SOOOO much!!! You are one of the coolest girls I have ever known. period.
CHELSEA DETTER: I remember when we started hanging out last summer, and i loved it! And yes we went on a few double dates, but now we can forget those boys and hang out the two of us!!!! i miss you.
SUMMER: You are my best friend in the world!!! I am NOT mad at you... don't think that!!! You are AMAZING i love you soooo much!!! I will see you soon darling!!
SARAH: best room mate in the world. It is soo nice to have someone there to talk to whenever I need to!! And same goes for you, i'm always right here! seriously... look to your left and i'm probably sitting right there!!
ALYSSA: ahhh i am sooo happy that we have become friends!!! You are such a fun girl. And along with sarah, i love having you here to talk about everything. And i love listenign whenever you need to talk! i love you alyssa melissa bahocki!
<3 |
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| 11:01pm 28/11/2005 |
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This weekend was very fun. I hung out with lots of friends: Summy, Tony, Kassi Lynn, Kelsey, Darin! I love all of my friends!
My brother's friends ben is going to be living in my bedroom for the next 5 months. His mom is going to work in Texas with her boyfriend so my parents are letting him stay at their house. I told him he could have my room. I don't understand how you could leave your son for that long!
Thanksgiving was fun. It was nice to see my family.
but i am happy to be back at school with my girls! |
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| 02:02am 14/11/2005 |
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Thursday night i didn't have much to do so i decided to go home instead of waiting til friday. Got a goodnight's rest and then went to breakfast (Bob's of course) and shopping with Summer. Got some cute new stuff and some quality time with my best friend in the world who i am IN LOVE with. Went home, got ready, and Darin picked me up. Went to his new (well i hadn't been there yet) house in Burton and hung out for a while and then went to see SAW 2. I seriously had tears in my eyes and my face covered through half the movie. It was disgusting. We made plans for the next night, he dropped me off and i drove over to Summer's house. We went to eat at Applebee's and WTF how'd we get stuck with the rudest server ever?? And we thought Chad was terrible? Ohh and we were completely stood up!! Ahhh i hate boys! Yeah, that's right BOYS! haha sum
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Worked early Saturday morning. Had a very looong day, which really wasn't so bad for me since i haven't worked in so long. Went back up to Bob's later on (i swear it's my third home) to get some dinner, and i stayed until Summy got off work. Then we went bowling!! Met Darin up at Holly Lanes. It was me, Summy, Darin, Kassi for a little while <3, Dia, Ryan, and Zach for about four whole frames. But apparently he had to leave cuz he KICKED SOME KIDS ASS?? i must've missed it. HAHA
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Sunday I was woke up at about 9 o'clock cuz my dad was working on Drew's bedroom. i swear 8 hours of sleep should've been enough but i fell asleep on the couch and my mom told me to go back to my room after my dad left, and i fell back asleep until 2!! umm... yeah it was kinda nice cuz i'm just getting over being sick. So i showered and went bowling (again) with my brother. I swear he's gonna get scholarships for it one day, he's so damn good. Left home at about 5, and sat on my computer from when i arrived (6ish) until now cuz i was writing a stupid speech that I have to give tomorrow!
So...
+ Summer is my love. I don't know what I would do with out her
- I missed my girlies at school
- BOYS suck.
+ worked
-/+ Saw 2
+ Saw Kassi for the first time in FOREVER. i swear we're hanging out again soon
+ I love having a close guy friend. LOVE IT. love darin.
+ YELLOWCARD tomorrow night!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ahhh goodnight <3 |
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| 11:12pm 05/11/2005 |
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Interesting weekend.
Thursday~ very fun!! Summer came down to visit! Along with some uninvited followers, but it turned out all good. We went dancing at Theo's and it was actually more fun that they did come because I would rather dance with guys I know, then all the drunk ones that were there. Summer, you have to come down again VERY soon!!!
Friday~ Went to a late dinner with Lysa, Stacy, and Garrison. It was fun, but afterwards I was bored as hell, and lonely cuz SARAH LEFT ME for the weekend.
Tonight~ Not as good as I had hoped :(
Coming back to Holly next weekend! Anyone wanna chill? Let me know!! |
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| 07:09pm 02/11/2005 |
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Summer is visiting tomorrow!! Summy I miss you like crazy babe!!
This weekend... Sarah's leaving me!!! ohh nooo whatever will i do!?
p.s.~ Ken Vasoli is the hottest man alive |
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| 01:46pm 31/10/2005 |
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mood: <img src="http://img.photobuck
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This weekend was AMAZING! I had such a good time with my girlies!!
( lots of pics ) |
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| 11:55pm 24/10/2005 |
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| You Are a Margarita | 
You aren't just the life of the party, you are the party!
You mix a good drink, bust out some great music, and know how to get down. |
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